Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Three Viagra Pills

A guy goes to his doctor and says,
"Doc, I have a problem."

"My girlfriend is sleeping over this Friday, my ex-wife is sleeping over this Saturday and my wife is coming home Sunday."

"I need 3 Viagra pills to satisfy them all."

The doctor says, "You know 3 Viagra pills 3 nights in a row is pretty dangerous for any man. I will give them to you on the condition that you return to my office on Monday so that I can check you out."

The man says, "You have a deal Doc."

Monday morning the man returns with his arm in a sling.

The doctor asks, "What happened"?

The man answered, "Nobody showed up!"

Smartest Kid Ever

A first-grade teacher, Ms Brooks was having trouble with one of her students. The teacher asked, "Harry what is your problem?" Harry answered, "I'm too smart for the first-grade. My sister is in the third -grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be in the third-grade too!

Ms Brooks had had enough. She took Harry to the principal's office. While Harry waited in the outer office, the teacher explained to the principal what the situation was. The principal told Ms Brooks he would give the boy a test and if he failed to answer any of his questions he was to go back to the first-grade and behave. She agreed. Harry was brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he agreed to take the test.

Principal: "What is 3 x 3?"
Harry: "9"

Principal: "What is 6 x 6?"
Harry: "36".

And so it went with every question the principal thought a third-grade should know.

The principal looks at Ms Brooks and tells her, "I think Harry can go to the third-grade."

Ms Brooks says to the principal, "Let me ask him some questions?" The principal and Harry both agree.

Ms Brooks asks, "What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?

Harry, after a moment: "Legs."

Ms Brooks: "What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?" The principal wondered, why does she ask such a question!

Harry replied: "Pockets."

Ms Brooks: "What does a dog do that a man steps into?"

Harry: "Pants"

Ms Brooks: What's starts with a C and ends with a T, is hairy, oval, delicious and contains thin whitish liquid?

Harry: Coconut

The principal's eyes open really wide and before he could stop the answer, Harry was taking charge.

Ms Brooks: What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?

Harry: Bubblegum

Ms Brooks: What does a man do standing up, a woman do sitting down and a dog do on three legs?" The principal's eyes open really wide and before he could stop the answer;

Harry: Shake hands

Ms Brooks: Now I will ask some "Who am I" sort of questions,okay?

Harry: Yep.

Ms Brooks: You stick your poles inside me. You tie me down to get me up. I get wet before you do.

Harry: Tent

Ms Brooks: A finger goes in me. You fiddle with me when you're bored. The best man always has me first.

The Principal was looking restless and bit tense.

Harry: Wedding Ring

Ms Brooks: I come in many sizes. When I'm not well, I drip. When you blow me, you feel good.

Harry: Nose

Ms Brooks: I have a stiff shaft. My tip penetrates. I come with a quiver.

Harry: Arrow

Ms Brooks: What word starts with an 'F' and ends in 'K' that means a lot of heat and excitement?

Harry: Firetruck

The principal breathed a sigh of relief and told the teacher, "Put Harry in the fifth-grade, I got the last ten questions wrong myself."

Sexy .... Sexy Girl

The picture below will calculate your imagination power Doesn't she look hot from inside the glass. I must admit its one of the
best and creative thinking of our human mind. After all humor blog is here for you to entertain and make you laugh...

Monday, January 19, 2009

I am an Idiot

I am an Idiot. A funny and quite humorous geek fun picture. Specially geeks gonna love this picture..

The pharmacist and cyanide

A nice, beautiful, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy shop, right up
to the pharmacist, looked straight into his eyes in different way and said 'I would
like to buy some cyanide.'The pharmacist asked in serious manner, “Why in the world do
you need cyanide?” as the pharmacist was suspected of her intention.
The beautiful lady replied, “I need it to poison my husband.”
The pharmacists' eyes got big and he exclaimed, “Lord have mercy!
I can’t give you deadly cyanide to kill your own husband! That’s against the law!
I’ll lose my license! if i sell you the cyanide. They’ll throw both of us in jail! All kinds of bad things will happen then.
Absolutely not! You CANNOT have any cyanide!”
The lady reached into her purse and pulled out a picture of her husband
in bed with the pharmacist’s wife. The estranged pharmacist looked at the picture and replied,“Well now. That’s different story. You should have told me before that you have prescription.