Its All Humor

Three Best Ways to Fail Drunk Driving Test , don't try this at home ;)

A middle-aged man returns home from a business trip a day early, concerned that his wife may be having an affair. He’s riding in a taxi at about 2:00 in the morning back towards his house. While en route home he asks the cabby if he would be a witness.He explains to the cabbie that he suspects his wife is sleeping around on him, and offers the him $50 if he would be a witness to the affair, if he could catch her in bed with him. By the time they reach his house, the cabbie agrees. They park a few doors down and, quietly, sneak into the front door and up the stairs. Then, with a burst of speed, the husband flicks on the bedroom lights and rips the blanket off the bed - and there his wife lays in bed with another man! Out of his coat pocket, the visibly distraught husband pulls out a gun and puts it to the naked man’s head. Just then, his wife yells “Don’t do it! I lied when I told you I inherited all that money!…” HE paid for the Mercedes I gave you. HE paid for our new cabin in the mou...

A man is driving in his car on the road. A woman is driving in her car on the same road, but in opposite direction When they pass each other, the man opens his car window and shouts to the woman: DONKEY ! The man immediately responds: MONKEY ! But continue their separate ways, the woman being very satisfied with her quick and smart reaction. And just as she reaches the first curve on the road .... Moral of the story: "Women never really understand what men are trying to say to them."

The National Highway Safety Council USA has done extensive testing on a newly designed seat belt . Seat belt laws results show that accidents can be reduced by as much as 95% when the belt is properly installed. Correct Installation is illustrated below....... Please pass on to family and friends. NEW SEAT BELT LAWS MAY HELP SAVE A LIFE!

The following are a sampling of real answers received on exams given by the California Department of Transportation's driving school. Q: Do you yield when a blind pedestrian is crossing the road? A: What for? He can't see my license plate. Q: Who has the right of way when four cars approach a four-way stop at the same time? A: The pick up truck with the gun rack and the bumper sticker saying, "Guns don't kill people. I do." Q: When driving through fog, what should you use? A: Your car. Q: How can you reduce the possibility of having an accident? A: Be too drunk to find your keys. Q: What problems would you face if you were arrested for drunk driving ? A: I'd probably lose my buzz a lot faster. Q: What changes would occur in your lifestyle if you could no longer drive lawfully ? A: I would be forced to drive unlawfully. Q: What are some points to remember when passing or being passed? A: Make eye contact and wave "hello" if she is cute. Q: What is the...