Signs you're all grown-up now

-- You keep more food than beer in the fridge.

-- 6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to bed.

-- You hear your favorite song on an elevator.

-- You watch the Weather Channel.

-- Your friends marry and divorce instead of hook up and break up.

-- You go from 130 days of vacation time to 14.

-- Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as "dressed up."

-- You're the one calling the police because those %&@# kids next door won't turn down the stereo.

-- You don't know what time Taco Bell closes anymore.

-- Your car insurance goes down and your payments go up.

-- Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt.

-- You no longer take naps from noon to 6 PM.

-- Dinner and a movie is the whole date, instead of the beginning of one.

-- A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer "pretty good stuff."

-- You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast time.

-- 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work.

-- You drink at home to save money before going to a bar.

-- You read this entire list, looking desperately for one sign that doesn't apply to you, but, can't find one to save your life.