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Funny Nursery Rhymes: Remixed

Mary had a little lamb
Her father shot it dead.
Now it goes to school with her
Between two chunks of bread.

Simple Simon met a pie man going to the fair.
Said Simple Simon to the pie man
'What have you got there?'
Said the pie man unto Simon
'Pies you dummy!'

Mary had a little lamb
It ran into a pylon.
10,000 volts went up its arse
And turned its wool to nylon.

Little Miss Muffet sat on a tuffet,
Eating a plate of stew
Along came a spider
And sat down beside her
So she ate that up, too
[Update from Mark]

Comments

Unknown said…
Mary had a little lamb
It's fleece was black as charcoal
Every time it jump'd the fence
You saw it's little arse-hole
Unknown said…
Little Miss Muffet sat on a tuffet,
Eating a plate of stew
Along came a spider
And sat down beside her
So she ate that up, too
Mary had a little sheep
and with this sheep she went to sleep
The sheep turned out to be a ram
Now Mary has a little lamb

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